Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Humphrey II


As many of you loyal Humphrey fans already know, there's another Humphrey on they way! Yes, Beth is pregnant again and we're expecting another little one sometime around August 4th. And, yes, that does mean she's twenty weeks along and I'm just now blogging about it. Why, you ask? Good question, I'm not sure I have the answer. Laziness and busyness can only excuse so much, I think the heart of the matter is that I just don't know what to say. The first time around, it's easy to articulate your feelings. The wonder, joy, confusion, inadequacy...and yes, utter terror, are all great fodder for amusing blog posts. The second time around, it is somehow greater, and less at the same time. I know first hand just how truly wondrous an event this is and will be for the rest of my life, it is a joy I could not begin to imagine half way through Amelia's gestation. On the other hand, I know that the best is yet to come; pregnancy is just the early indicator of the real change on the horizon (I know, easy for a man to say). I'm confident we can handle that which is to come, but I feel abject horror at the tragic possibilities which I can not control. On balance it all leads to a sort of ambivalence. Not the type of ambivalence indicative of lack of interest, more the type of knowing the Christmas is around the corner, but not wanting to get so excited that you just can't stand it (and also knowing you haven't always been a good little boy this year).

That all changed today. We had the big 20-week ultrasound this morning, our third ultrasound it so happens, but the first containing images resembling a baby. Something got to me today and the fluttering excitement of the days following Amelia's birth has started to re-emerge. I don't think it was the pictures as you might expect (although the images were amazingly clear and the baby was active and playful as can be). I think what got me was that we accidentally found out the sex of the baby, somehow that makes it more real all of a sudden, I have something tangible to fixate on. It's a wonderful feeling.

So, yes, you read correctly, we accidentally found out the sex when I spotted something on the screen that I wasn't supposed to see. Now some people have said that means it's definitely a boy. I'm a bit offended that after 17 months of changing Amelia's diapers these people still don't think I'm familiar with girl parts. Either way, we're going to keep it a surprise for now.

So, enough about me, how's Beth? Beth is amazing as always. She was sick as a dog for the first 3-4 months, but did she complain, of course not...well, maybe a little bit, but not nearly as much as I would have. This pregnancy's been harder than the last one, but she's tough as nails. Things seem to be better these days, a little ligament pain here and some fatigue there, but overall things seem fine. She's definitely started to show in the last few weeks and she's even started to feel the baby kicking around some.

That's all for now. I'm sure there will be more to come...in about 20 weeks!